Poodle Allergies
by LC Rose
Summary: Souta's pet poodle escapes back in time, unknowingly, with Kagome by hiding in her bag. She just didn't know the trouble the little fur ball would cause... *rated M for hanyou language right now*
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER:** The characters of InuYasha are not mine. They are the property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

_**A/N:**__ Just a bit of fun influenced by a certain person I know and respect. This is will be a short, short chapter fic, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless._

**Poodle Allergies**

Kagome had never known that bringing a dog back through the well with her would cause such a commotion!

And she hadn't actually _meant _to bring the damn thing…

The poodle had just slipped into her bag, going after the doggy treats her mom had packed for Inuyasha, and Kagome hadn't noticed the difference in weight. Was it her fault that Inuyasha and her school life demanded so much from her that she couldn't tell the bag was ten pounds heavier than it normally was? No! Not at all!

Upon discovery of the dog on the other side of the well, Kagome had wanted to turn around and take it right the hell back, but Inuyasha had grumbled and complained about wasted time. And so, Kagome had given in and just carried the little beast of burden, letting Sango love on it when she was tired of carrying the pest. Souta's ears would be in for a world of hurt when she returned and politely instructed him to better look after his damn dog. She had enough of the flea bags to deal with as it were! She didn't need additional pooch care.

_Think of a fleabag and one more appears_, Kagome thought to herself as the all-too-familiar presence of Sesshoumaru, self-proclaimed Lord of the Western Lands, strutted out into view ahead of them on the trail they currently traveled down. While the Western Lord's demeanor had changed slightly in the last few months, Kagome did not trust the old dog even a little bit, more closely following Inuyasha's feelings towards him than she let on. After all, it wouldn't do for her current image if she let everyone know what she actually thought of the white haired demon.

While he was sex on two legs (and sometimes sex on _four _legs, if she wanted to be entirely honest with herself—after all, she did apparently have a dog fetish buried deep within), the daiyoukai was entirely too stuck-up and self-concerned to be even more than passively appealing. One had only to speak with him to see what he was really like and Kagome found herself wondering if the dog demon had ever even managed to have sex. It would suck to be an eight-hundred-year-old virgin…

As if he knew she was thinking about him—and not very favorably thoughts at that—Sesshoumaru's eyes slid past his ranting half-brother to focus on her and Kagome gulped, partially out of fear that he _could_ read minds and partially because his eyes were just that cold.

Those very cold eyes combed down her body, dismissing her instantly, before suddenly widening and focusing back on what she held in her hands. Kagome glanced down, forgetting that she'd been holding Souta's poodle at the moment, and then looked back up to see Sesshoumaru bearing down on her. 'Eeping', Kagome back peddled until she was closer to Miroku and Sango while trying to remember what the rules were about how to handle approaching vicious dogs. By the Kami, they'd just gone over this recently in one of her school's "street safety lessons"!

Did she keep eye contact or look off to the side? Would a loud noise scare Sesshoumaru away? Should she thump him on his nose? Would he like one of the dog biscuits she had left over in her bag or would Inuyasha throw a tantrum that she was going to use them to save her life?

Thankfully she didn't have to find out as the bundle of curly fur in her arms began growling evilly, bringing the daiyoukai bearing down on her to a confused standstill. Kagome would have laughed if she wasn't scared out of her mind at the moment. "What is that abomination?" the daiyoukai demanded to know, taking a step backwards that Kagome couldn't help but catch.

"It's Kagome's fuckin' poodle!" Inuyasha answered for her, coming up to stand almost brotherly beside Sesshoumaru as he, too, glared at the ball of fluff in her arms. "Protective little shit," he continued to grumble. "Won't let me near my trea—Kagome."

"He's not mine," Kagome quickly corrected, glaring at Inuyasha for not stepping in between her and his brother. Really, her and Sesshoumaru's track record wasn't so great as far as socialization went and Inuyasha should know that. "And you are a gluttonous pig, Inuyasha. Thinking of your dog biscuits instead of me!"

"It's that fuckin' dog!" Inuyasha continued to whine, oblivious to the fact that his brother had just heard that he liked dog treats.

"Who I wanted to take back," Kagome reminded him sternly. Then she turned to look at Sesshoumaru. "It's just a poodle. No reason to be scared of him. His bark is worse than his bite. Like you."

Her mouth, Kagome decided, had lost its ever-loving mind…

The daiyoukai's eyes widened notably more after hearing her bold speech and Kagome swore she saw a leakage of red in there with the normally icy gold. But then he looked back down at the ball of fluff in her arms, which was still growling and yipping up a storm, and turned away. "This is not over, miko," she heard Sesshoumaru say before he left as quickly as he'd arrived.

Kagome counted her lucky stars and thanked her guardian angels that night as they made camp, her poodle protector trailing after her like the loyal lap dog he was turning out to be. Really, the dog had contained most of her troubles with only a single yip and this trip was turning out to be a lot easier than any of the previous ones. Of course, when shit really hit the fan Kagome would have to be the protector since the dog thought it was of Sesshoumaru-size proportions when, in fact, it didn't even reach her kneecaps.

Speaking of dogs with egos bigger than themselves, Kagome turned her attention to Inuyasha, who was glaring at the poodle again. "You can stop now, Inuyasha. He doesn't even realize your hating on him."

"Fuck," Inuyasha replied, folding his arms across his chest in childish display.

_He can be so damn cute sometimes! _Kagome thought to herself as she watched Inuyasha try and act macho and manly in front of his pint-sized opponent. But then she was reminded of their earlier encounter with Sesshoumaru. "Stay," she ordered the poodle, who immediately sat down. It had become quite obvious early on that the sit command just wouldn't work with this dog and Inuyasha in the same place at the same time. Thankfully, though, the poodle had had more brains than the hanyou and had learned that stay meant pretty much the same thing as sit.

Leaving the poodle to stare woefully after her, Kagome went over to where the hanyou was sitting and sat down next to him. "So. What was up with your brother today?"

"HALF-brother," Inuyasha reminded her stubbornly.

"Okay. HALF-brother. What was up with him?"

"Hell if I know, but the sooner we get rid of the rat the better."

As if the poodle knew Inuyasha was talking about him, Kagome heard a familiar growl. She turned, fully expecting to merit out some doggy discipline, and instead found her vision blocked by white. Looking up the long, length of billowing silk before her, Kagome only had time to gasp before she was roughly grabbed, flipped over Sesshoumaru's shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and then had her stomach pulled into her throat by means of nauseously fast movement as Sesshoumaru sped away with her.

*PA*

Icy water assailed her, waking her up from her passed-out stupor. Kagome sputtered, flailing her arms around her uselessly as her mind came back into the present. Then she stilled, realizing her life wasn't in danger of ending due to drowning—as the water wasn't more than a few inches deep—and her backside would be even more sore if she continued to move it against the rocky bottom of the stream Sesshoumaru had thrown her in. Speaking of the dog demon…

Twisting around to look behind her, Kagome found Sesshoumaru standing a few feet away. The daiyoukai wore an obviously pleased look on his face as he watched her splash in the cold mountain stream. "What in the hell?" she found herself shouting before clapping her hands over her mouth to stop anything else from coming out. Not that what she had already said wasn't enough of a reason for Sesshoumaru to gut her. _Please leave something for Inuyasha to take back to momma…_

"You smell better now, miko," the daiyoukai surprisingly answered, not showing the least bit of insult over her tone.

Standing up, rubbing her abused backside and abdomen, Kagome wearily watched Sesshoumaru as she moved to the opposite side of the small stream. While it wasn't much of a barrier and Sesshoumaru could cross the distance between them faster than she could blink, Kagome did it anyway. It was all just a superficial mind-fuck for herself to help keep from re-wetting her already dripping skirt and panties. Sesshoumaru had abducted her, for Kamis sake!

He smirked at her obviousness, but still did not move from where he had positioned himself.

Unsure of what to do, Kagome began righting her appearance as best as she could. Squeezing the excess water out of her skirt and shirt, thankful she hadn't changed into her pajamas yet, she kicked off her shoes and removed her socks. She squeezed the water out of her socks next and put her shoes back on without them. If there was one thing she hated most, it was wearing wet socks! Next came her toes pruning…which is something she worked hard to avoid no matter how long she stayed in the bath back at home. All things were possible when one was determined!

Realizing she was letting her mind wander when it really should be focused, she turned and found Sesshoumaru hadn't moved an inch. She wasn't even sure if the daiyoukai was breathing, so much like a statue did he resemble. "Well," she said with a light clap of her hands and a bow of respect. "I've been more than suitably punished for my poor behavior, Sesshoumaru-sama. I deeply apologize for my mouth and thank you for the leniency you've shown me in this matter. I'll just be heading back to Inuyasha now if you'll only point me in the right direction…"

Hopeful, Kagome took a few sidesteps in the direction she thought Inuyasha and the others might be. Then she realized statue Sesshoumaru wasn't going to lend her any aid. Very well. It hadn't been expected, after all.

Turning her back to the daiyoukai, after playing a mental game of 'eeny, meeny, miny, moe', Kagome started off into the surrounding trees looking forward to dry pajamas, maybe some ramen, and her new poodle space-heater.

CRACK!

The sound of a whip split the night air and Kagome only knew of one being who even had anything remotely like a whip between the two of them. An instant later she felt the snap of it against her derriere and her back end was receiving remarkably _more_ of the cool night air against it. 'Eeping' again, a sound she was coming to relate to Sesshoumaru, Kagome splayed her hands across her butt and realized, first hand, that her skirt was now sporting a very revealing gap. She spun around, red-faced, and sputtered for a full minute before the daiyoukai deemed it time to speak. "This one did not give you permission to leave, miko. Stay."

Beyond angry for all the insults she'd received so far this evening—being abducted without a by-your-leave, being dumped in icy cold water, being mocked with silence, and then having her expensive school uniform ruined, Kagome scrunched up her fists at her side and marched back over to where Sesshoumaru stood. She glared up at the daiyoukai, feeling the fires of the seven hells building within her, and struck out with her hand…

…smacking one previously arrogant demon lord across his finely chiseled nose.

"Bad dog!"

_to be continued..._


	2. Chapter 2

a/n: My muse is playing nice. Enjoy chapter two of Poodle Allergies.

Chapter Two…

Throughout history there were many famous last words, last stands, last…last everything. Most of the people in the situation of having such admirable words acclaimed to them came to be there by noble means such as dying in a battle against repression or tyranny. But for her, for the time-traveling miko from the future, Kagome Higurashi, there seemed to be only stupidity and rashness as a marker for her stone. Yes. She would be remembered for that…and for the amount of teeny tiny pieces Sesshoumaru tore her up into.

SMACK!

"Bad dog!"

'…_It's the smack heard round the world_…' Kagome thought stupidly to herself, her hand still hanging in midair.

Understandably the daiyoukai's eyes instantly bled red and the markings on his face turned jagged. His youki unleashed itself, tossing loose stones and twigs and other debris around them. Yet strangely not a single thing touched her as she stood dumb-struck by her actions in front of him. Perhaps Sesshoumaru wanted to save all her pain for first-hand gratification?

Well, hell. She wasn't about to remain standing there, waiting. She'd at least _try_ and run futilely for it.

Pivoting in place, Kagome let out an ear-piercing scream and ran for all she worth.

She made it maybe five steps before Sesshoumaru's hand clamped down on her shoulder and spun her back around to look at him. Squeezing her eyes shut, not wanting to think about the pain she was about to experience, Kagome waited for another acid bath—one she would NOT be protected from by Inuyasha's sword.

And then…nothing.

Not a damn thing.

Peeking out one eye, she checked her situation. Standing in front of an entirely pissed off daiyoukai? Check. Red eyes glaring at her? Check. Hand tipped with very sharp claws too near to her throat? Check. Dead? Not check.

Something was off here.

"I'm sorry?" she whispered as meekly as she could, though she didn't really feel that way. Well, perhaps Kagome regretted her rash actions, but she had found actually DOING it entirely satisfying. Sesshoumaru had long needed, in her opinion, to be rapped on the nose for his behavior.

The hand sitting menacingly on her shoulder tightened, his long fingers digging into her flesh but not yet painfully. Then the hand moved down to her arm, the grip easing slightly but still keeping a good hold on her. Kagome closed her eyes again, sure the end was nigh, and was surprised when she was suddenly spun about, presenting her backside to him once more.

SMACK!

"AH!" she couldn't help but cry out as the flat of Sesshoumaru's other hand met with her tender hide. And no, he wouldn't just go for her nicely padded butt cheeks. Ever the sadist, Sesshoumaru chose to spank the lower half of her ass where her cheeks met her thighs and where the skin was extra tender.

SMACK!

SMACK! SMACK!

SMACK!

"Wayward pup," she could have sworn she heard the daiyoukai mutter uncharacteristically as he suddenly released her.

Immediately Kagome moved her hands to her butt, now fighting back the tears of the wounded. It had hurt, damn it! She hadn't been spanked since she was very, very little and even then Kagome knew her mother had never hit her very hard. Sesshoumaru hadn't had any difficulty in swatting her or in using a considerable amount of strength when he did.

Did he spank Rin?

No. That little girl was too sweet to ever earn her guardian's disapproval… Unlike herself.

What in the hell? Why was she sniffling like some wounded fan?

"Stay," Sesshoumaru ordered her, seeming to have been calmed by his actions as his eyes faded back to their usual cool gold.

Much like the dog he was taking her for, Kagome growled at the command and earned a slightly amused look from the once more stoic daiyoukai. "What do you want from me, Sesshoumaru?" she demanded to know, all thoughts of respect gone for the moment.

"Retribution."

Kagome's eyes bugged out at that word as she searched her mind for the definition of retribution. Okay. Jiji had always said retribution was a punishment or reward distributed in a future life based upon performance in this one. Jiji had also always said that it was more often than not a punishment.

Future life? Was Sesshoumaru going to kill her? "Are you going to kill me?" Kagome asked before she could think better of it.

"Perhaps. In time. After."

_Huh?_ _After? After what?_

Kagome found herself backing away again, a hard look from the daiyoukai in front of her stopping her movement instantly. "I never did anything to you!" she protested.

She couldn't help herself as she glanced down at where Sesshoumaru's new arm was. Okay. Maybe she was a _little _to blame for that incident—the losing of the arm, that is—but seriously. It had been a kill or be killed game—by his making—and she'd done what needed to be done. And it hadn't actually been HER who lopped the arm off anyway! Besides, he had the damn thing back now. Couldn't bygones be bygones?

Then Kagome began trying to think of what else she might have done to the daiyoukai and came up with….

Nothing.

"What in the hell did I do to you?"

Again, the mouth was running rampart. Damn the mouth! Damn it to the seven hells!

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed at her question. "Dare you pretend ignorance, _human._"

"Okay. First, I _am_ a human and therefore do not find the term offensive. So you can stop saying it like I'm suppose to start crying over it or something. Second, I have no idea what you are talking about, Sesshoumaru! You've got to start making sense sometime within the next hundred years, please!"

Quick as lightning Sesshoumaru's hand darted out, clutching her around her throat and lifting her off the ground. Kagome grabbed onto his wrist, but found that strangely Sesshoumaru hadn't cut off her air supply when he'd latched on to her. No. It was more like he was holding her by the scruff, as he would a puppy he was bringing to heel. He brought her close to him, so close Kagome could feel his breath ghosting across her skin. Thank the Kami he didn't eat dog food! "You are vexing!" he spat with more emotion than Kagome had heard him ever use before.

"Of course I am!" she answered. "I'm female!"

Sesshoumaru held her out as far as he could from himself without letting her go. His eyes combed up and down her body as if, for the very first time, he was realizing that she was, indeed, female. "Oh Kami!" Kagome cried out in disbelief. "You really hadn't noticed that I don't have a penis?"

Was it her or was there a faint tinge of color to Sesshoumaru's cheeks?

"You will shut your mouth if you do not wish to lose your tongue, girl."

Kagome immediately zipped her lips. Even though her tongue was burning with comments and questions and was feeling mighty reckless this evening, she forced herself to remain quiet.

For a full minute the daiyoukai stared at her, as if eagerly waiting for her to speak. _Tough cookies, dog,_ Kagome thought to herself as she secretly ranted in her mind. _I ain't barking a word!_

The fact that her sense of humor seemed to be sticking around was a good sign. Maybe.

Then, slowly, he lowered her back down to the ground and removed his hand from her throat. "You will run from me now, miko."

Kagome opened her mouth to ask exactly _where_ she was suppose to run to and _why _she had to run, but snapped her lips shut as his eyes flashed red again and his youki spiked. She stumbled backwards, letting out another wake-the-dead scream as Sesshoumaru seemed to be consumed by his youki. His facial features stretched almost grotesquely as his body changed from his human form that of his canine, exploding outward in a massive wave of wind and youki reminisce.

When the dust cleared, Kagome was gaping up at Sesshoumaru's true form, his lethal jaws snapping at the air as if it offended him. Then those demon red eyes focused down on her and he barked, effectively deafening her for a moment and throwing her equilibrium off. Kagome stumbled around stupidly, waving her hands around her again in case she fell or knocked up against something. Then she was bumped by a very large and very cold nose.

Turning, Kagome braced herself against Sesshoumaru's muzzle before she realized what she was holding on to and moved hastily back. "Right," she said to the glaring red eye that was almost as large as she was and was down at her level. "You want me to run. Do I get a head start?"

In answer, canine Sesshoumaru stood up, his fluffy tail giving a surprising wag of anticipation as his tongue lolled almost puppy-like out the side of his mouth.

Kagome took that as a yes.

"Okay. Okay. I'm running!"

*PA*

"AAAHHH!"

Kagome was sure she did not sound like a proper chew toy for a dog, but did she care? No. Not really.

_Oh, Kami! Oh, Kami! Oh, Kami! _

Running faster than she'd ever run before, sure that she was going to be squished at any moment by a huge dog paw, Kagome used all her sixteen years of accumulated smarts to her best advantage. How? By running blindly through the night screaming her head off, of course!

Scared out of her wits, Kagome couldn't think of anything else to do. It wasn't like Sesshoumaru would _lose_ her or anything. He was just playing with his food.

Food? Ew.

Kagome really didn't want to be devoured and she was sure she would cause a tummy upset being that she regularly ate copious amounts of sugar in the form of Pocky and lots of preservatives and MSG.

Sure she could feel Sesshoumaru's hot dog breath coursing down the back of her neck, Kagome refused to look behind her. '_I am going to DIE!'_ she thought to herself just as she heard the most wonderful sound in the world.

"KAGOME!"

Spinning in place, stopping so fast she _did_ fall to the ground, Kagome searched wildly around for her savior. She spotted the red clothing and charged towards it like a bull. Just as she was about to reach Inuyasha, a paw as big as her mom's car crashed down on the ground between them and sent both herself and Inuyasha flying from the shock wave.

She landed hard, the breath knocked out of her and her shoes disappearing into the night. Gasping for air, Kagome looked up at the super large dog head hovering over her, a wickedly playful light in the demon's eyes. He turned his massive body, giving his half brother a nice view of his backside as he faced her. Another bark sent Kagome's head ringing and she raised her hands to cover her ears as he did it again. "Shut up already!" she screamed.

'_Ah! Now these are my famous last words',_ Kagome thought as Sesshoumaru's jaws opened wide and started down towards her.

But she was NOT devoured!

She was saved—and not by her usual hanyou hero. Inuyasha was still trying to fight his way through the tangle of Sesshoumaru's legs and tail. As her hearing returned to her, Kagome could even make out him screaming her name again. Nope! Her hero, this time, was the little red-haired ball of toy sized fluff that had a mental image of its self as being as large as a mountain. Souta's poodle darted between herself and the drooling razor sharp filled jaws of Sesshoumaru and began barking up a storm. His little barks were so ferocious and fast that both front paws of the dog jolted off the ground every time he sounded off.

'_Doggy recoil?' _Kagome thought with a snicker.

And then came the sight Kagome never thought she'd see.

Sesshoumaru backed the hell away, stepping on poor Inuyasha in the process. His large doggy head cocked sideways and a look that Kagome couldn't put under any other heading than terror or mayhap absolutely confusion—it's was so hard to read the dog demon's eyes—crossed his face. Then he glared at her one last time and sped away.

What as it with dog demons and poodles?

"Yeah!" Kagome screamed at the retreating demon as her spunk was restored. "You better run!"

_to be continued..._

Post a/n: I have recently acquired a roommate and with said roommate came a little brown piece of fluff in the form of a toy poodle named Redd who readily has adopted me into his pack. And let me tell you they are some mouthy dogs with mental images of themselves being ten times bigger than they are! So, if ever by chance I found myself facing off with a dog of Sesshoumaru's size, I have no doubt my little pack master would definitely interfere in trying to save me.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three…

It wasn't until three days after the Sesshoumaru incident—as she was calling it—that Kagome discovered her poodle savior's weakness.

Thunder.

Actually make that a copious amount of thunder _and_ lightning.

Standing underneath the awning of a local headman's abode, Kagome clutched the poodle tightly in her arms. She felt each tremor that spread through its tiny body as if it were her own. "It's okay, baby," she cooed to the small dog over and over again. "Kagome's here to protect you."

"Oi!" came a partially muffled cry from behind her.

Kagome turned and faced the currently mummified hanyou. Yes, she'd been a little zealous this time around, but her veins had also been coursing with extra adrenaline and Inuyasha was far too squished still to even attempt to take the bandages off. Once again, Kagome found herself grateful for Inuyasha's youkai heritage. He was perhaps the only one of their group who could be stepped on by a 50 ton dog and still be around to bitch and moan about it. "Yes, Inuyasha?"

"Don't spoil the mutt," he answered gruffly with a shrug. The careless action was followed by a wince as pain arched through his battered body.

"He's not a mutt, Inuyasha. And he has a name. It's Ichigo," Kagome corrected as she continued to caress the red-haired poodle shivering in her arms. She felt for Inuyasha, knowing that he HAD to be suffering, and she really, really wanted to pamper him, but her arms were currently full of poodle. "Also, Ichigo happens to be pure bred."

"And we ALL know what pure breeds are like," Inuyasha retorted, his voice hardening.

Of course Kagome could not fault the hanyou his views considering his past. Sesshoumaru was, in general terms, a 'pure breed' himself and yet had always presented, in her opinion, the worse possible picture when it came to guidance and follow through.

_Inuyasha has more nobility in his little toe than that piece of—_

At that thought, Kagome could not help but picture again her harried race through the woodlands as she'd screamed her head off for what seemed like Sesshoumaru's own personal pleasure. And despite all she'd gone through she STILL didn't know what in the hell she'd done to offend the dog demon so… "My poodle is not like that," she argued.

"Your poodle? I thought the damn ankle biter belonged to Souta!"

Leaving the hanyou to his whining and in the capable hands of Miroku, Kagome retreated to the room the headman had set aside for Sango and herself. The slayer had finished with her bathing and was waiting. As soon as Kagome walked into the room, Sango's eyes alighted upon the poor shivering mass of fluff in her arms. "Awww," the fearsome slayer cried, holding out her arms in welcome embrace. At her side, Kirara seemed to roll her eyes in patient understanding while she cleaned her paws.

"Would you like to hold him?" Kagome asked, giving the neko youkai a wink as she did.

"The poor baby!" Sango cried out, as the poodle leapt ably from Kagome's arms to her own. And then the demon slayer's speech regressed to an age Kagome was not yet fluent in—or perhaps had once been but was no more.

What was it with poodles and demon slayers?

*PA*

Sesshoumaru stood a discreet distance away—downwind of course—and spied upon his little brother's group and that horrible beast that had entered his world. Never had he met a more insufferable pest than the one that clung to that human woman. He could not even begin to recognize how WRONG the creature was as his natural instinct was to wipe it out of existence…and yet he couldn't. For some unknown reason, fear swept through him at the very sound of its yip and rage covered all logic at the very scent of its odor.

Though he was some distance away, it was almost as if the hanyou were standing next to him when he heard Inuyasha yell, "Aw, fuckin' hell, Kagome! Why do we have to stop NOW?"

"He needs to poop, Inuyasha," the miko replied, her patience seeming to be near an ending point as she set the _thing _down onto the ground to smell the grasses. "It's natural and something you should know about."

At her reply his brother blushed a bright red and Sesshoumaru found himself agreeing with the miko's sarcastic expression. If he were a less dignified individual, he might have done the same.

The group remained there for some time, resting it appeared. This gave Sesshoumaru the perfect opportunity to study the creature, but nothing seemed forthcoming in such a short time period. Perhaps, if he stayed with his vigilance for slightly longer, he could come to understand what made it such a menacing opponent?

By the end of the day, having been following after his brother and his brother's things for quite some time, Sesshoumaru was about as close to understanding the monstrosity as he had been before and now he was exceedingly more so vexed. Exceedingly!

He just could not understand the rat-like thing's appeal…or why he felt so low in its presence. And how the miko bowed and scraped to its needs! Truly his brother had to be far more remarkable than he seemed—or far less evolved than most normal life forms—as Inuyasha continued to have such a close proximity without showing even an ounce of the fear and anger Sesshoumaru KNEW had to be present there.

He refused to think he was alone in this.

And the very image of the miko rubbing vigorously on the thing's belly as the beast lay prone before her was just as insufferable as the thought of Inuyasha being better at something than he. The smile she wore on her face as she seemed to continually cater to it was even more sickening. If there was anyone the miko bitch should serve, it was he…naturally.

_How would it feel to have this one's belly rubbed?_

No! He did not want a _human_ to serve him in any way (especially in THAT sense) other than as cannon fodder—for that was all humans were worth in his eyes. _Save Rin, of course_, Sesshoumaru quickly corrected. Damn. Sometimes it was SO hard to keep prejudices alive when he carried one around with him. _But Rin is different, _he reminded himself.

They were finally settling in for the evening and Sesshoumaru chose the best vantage point from which to continue his investigation. Even though he had been around them for a goodly amount of time he had learned little because his own feelings and thoughts had kept intruding and sending him off on random internal babbling sessions. He had even been distracted from watching his brother battle a lowly, shard-crazed oni because his fascination had been centered solely on the whimpering rat in the miko's arms.

Was it only HE that the thing fought against? And why, in the seven layers of Hell, had the beast seen it a fitting action to ROLL in the oni's remains? Disgusting.

"It stinks!" Sesshoumaru heard his brother say, mirroring his own thoughts on how the _thing _more than likely smelled after having rotated so energetically in the bug youkai's entrails earlier.

The miko replied with an impressive growl as she stomped around their campsite gathering various items into her arms. "You don't have to keep saying it, Inuyasha!" she spat back with a huff in his brother's direction. "I'm going to bathe him, alright!"

The hanyou stood defiantly, crossing his arms across his chest and raising his chin. "It ain't coming back here until I don't have to smell bug no more!"

"Inu….yasha," the miko replied, dragging out his brother's name in a most threatening manner. "You might want to think about taking a bath yourself. You don't smell like roses, either!"

Then the miko proceeded to scoop the pest up into her free arm, struggling to hold onto it without letting it touch her person, and stomped off into the woods. Sesshoumaru knew from a quick sniff that there was a hot spring in the direction she went and he watched as both the slayer and kitsune followed after her. "Bath time!" the kitsune sung as he bounced along, sticking his tongue out in Inuyasha's direction before disappearing.

The monk made to follow too, but was stopped by Inuyasha's hand on his shoulder. "Don't even think about it," his brother growled in warning.

_Strange,_ Sesshoumaru thought. Perhaps something happened to the pest when it was wet that affected males? No, the kitsune had accompanied the females to the hot springs. Maybe the males had to be of rutting age…

Whatever it was, Sesshoumaru decided that it was worth investigating and moved his position to do so.

*PA*

Kagome couldn't find any proof, but she could have SWORN she was being watched. And this wasn't just a being-watching-in-Kanna's-mirror-feeling either. No, someone was out there and he/she/it had his/her/its eyes on them.

So it was, of course, with caution that she approached the hot springs (after her anger towards Inuyasha had settled some) and changed into her swimming suit. Kirara and Shipou both stood watch—mainly looking out for Miroku but aware that there were other more dangerous villains about. Once she had changed, Kagome comforted her stinky dog from a distance while Sango put on the bathing suit Kagome had brought for her.

When the slayer emerged from the foliage, Kagome turned and looked at her. "Are you ready for this, Sango?"

"It is just a dog, Kagome. I am sure the two of us can manage him."

"Pfft," was her reply as she turned back to face the poodle. "You haven't seen anything yet."

As if he realized what was going on, that the delicious odors he'd so recently acquired were going to be forcefully expelled from his body, Ichigo took a wary step back from the humans he'd come to enjoy the presence of so much.

"Once we catch him," Kagome instructed. "I'll let you know what can and cannot be done to him. Poodles are very…delicate…breeds when it comes to bathing them and there isn't a vet here for…well centuries."

Sango watched as Kagome positioned herself, angling for a good grab, and motioned with her head for her to do the same. "You come from the right. I'll come from the left."

Though she did not believe the situation called for such dire actions, Sango took the position indicated nonetheless. She refused to believe it would be so hard to catch the smelly dog and she couldn't wait to bathe him! It was almost as if she had a baby in her midst, the love and care Kagome's futuristic pet required appealing to a maternal side she hadn't even been aware she had.

Together she and Kagome approached the now fully alert poodle. "We'll go in on the count of three," Kagome continued. "One, two, three!"

Sango darted forward and grabbed at where the poodle was standing. She could have sworn she felt fur, but when she looked her hands were empty. Then Kagome stumbled into her and they both went down. "Damn," she heard Kagome curse.

Popping back up to her feet, Sango looked for where the poodle had run to. He was standing about ten feet away, his poof ball tail wagging with delight because of his escape, and Sango narrowed her eyes. Then he barked at her, the excited yipping sounding like a challenge, and Sango accepted the dare.

No dog would get the best of her.

_to be continued..._

a/n: Before you ask, yes the poodle is named after Ichigo from Bleach (which I also own nothing of nor profit from, to add to my disclaimers). I asked a friend of mine for help in naming the dog and she pointed out that Souta would probably be a fan of such a manga and the poodle is a red-head. It was fitting!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four…

_No dog will get the best of me! _Sango thought as she finally held tightly onto the truly squirming mass of fur in her hands. _Take this!_

She moved to toss Kagome's poodle into the water of the hot springs when Kagome let out a loud, "NO!"

Sango narrowed her eyes, feeling her victory being stolen out from under her, and looked from the poodle to her friend. "Why? He needs to bathe," she bit out, irritated that her skills had seemed to be so lacking when it came to capturing poodle. Not even demons seemed to have its agility and speed…or she needed more training.

"Poodles have sensitive ears," Kagome tried to explain. All of Sango's slaying instincts were in full roar and Ichigo was very close to being dunked into the water and held under until he stopped fighting. "They can get infections and we don't have any medicine for him here."

She took a step closer and held out her hands. "I'll take it from here, Sango. Thanks for your help."

Once Kagome had the poodle securely in her grasp, Sango let go. The slayer huffed, brushing bits of leaves and dirt from her body and hair, before wading ahead of Kagome into the water. _Maternal instincts be damned… Cats are better than dogs_, she thought, looking to where Kirara was lounging in kitten form far from the water.

She turned to watch, amusement in her mind at the thought of the poodle finally getting what it deserved, as Kagome waded carefully into the waters. Her friend tested them with her own body before gently—much too gently for Sango's tastes at the moment—lowering the shivering, whining poodle down into the water.

And then the dog's fight was gone.

He became as docile as usual, his tail drooping in defeat and his sad, sad eyes staring at Sango, looking for pity and rescue. It wasn't long before Sango waded back over to where her friend and the dog were. "There, there, Ichigo," she cooed. "We will be quick."

"What a wimp!" chimed in Shippou, who had stayed well clear of them during their poodle round-up.

"Shippou, you're starting to sound like Inuyasha," Kagome reprimanded as she cupped water in her hands and poured it over the part of the poodle she couldn't sink into the water. She cast a well-meaning look over her shoulder at the little kitsune, who gulped and then scampered back towards camp with some excuse about checking on the whereabouts of Miroku.

"Men," giggled Sango, as she began helping Kagome wet Ichigo down. "Wow. His fur holds a lot of water."

"Oh yes. Can you get my shampoo? It does not smell manly, but it's the only soap I have."

Kagome kept the dejected poodle afloat while Sango fetched the bottle of shampoo she'd brought with her from their campsite.

*PA*

Sesshoumaru found the best vantage point—knowing it was the best because _he'd _found it—and settled in just as the two human females entered the clearing with the beast in hand. The small pup was all a-go with his wagging tail, sickening Sesshoumaru actually, and then the tail fell as the miko set him down upon the ground and began preparing to enter the water…

This made Sesshoumaru smile.

He waited with bated breath as the miko finally emerged from behind the shrub that was _supposedly _used to hide her naked body from his sight and eyed the monstrosity with determination. He'd seen this look in the miko's eyes before. Something the _thing _was not going to like was about to happen and Sesshoumaru had an inkling that it was going to be a bath.

He was an intelligent youkai, after all.

And then the slayer emerged from behind that same shrub, her body visibly jumping with energy and excitement. She turned those energized eyes towards the mutt in their midst and Sesshoumaru felt his grin widen as they began to circle the now suspicious beast.

Let the fun begin…

_Holy hell! How incompetent are they?_ Sesshoumaru thought to himself sometime later as he watched both the miko and slayer hit the ground AGAIN. _Perhaps human females reach an age where their brains malfunctions and everything else goes with it?_ He'd have to keep an eye on Rin now—to make sure she would be safe and well as time passed. No adopted pet of his would ever act this diminished in capabilites!

The situation was so intense Sesshoumaru actually had to extract his claws from the bark of the tree he stood by and…maybe…he used too much force as did. The sound of his claws rendering themselves free caused the miniature escape artist to stop mid-flight and the slayer finally was able to lay hands upon his body, scooping him up into her arms with an evil and maniacal light in her eyes.

Sesshoumaru was then MOST disappointed when the miko rescued the mutt from the slayer's claws…but the after show was quite entertaining!

It looked so pathetically weak as the miko lowered its shivering body into the water. His delight was full blown, watching it be humiliated and shamed, and then the women began their damn cooing; coddling it as if it were truly in pain and hurting from a most needed washing!

Ridiculous.

Sesshoumaru turned away then, studying the length and sharpness of his claws, as the miko and the slayer finished bathing the wretched waste of flesh. He did not look over towards them again until the two females were done with their "torture" and the miko set her guardian down on dry ground…staying in the water herself.

_Hn. Perhaps if this Sesshoumaru were to face the beast without its bitch in tow…_

Golden eyes watching the dog's movements, he grunted with disgust as he observed the thing run around like a human with its head popped off before rolling excitedly upon the ground—more than likely glad to be free once more to soil itself. The miko watched with a careful eye for a while—never scolding where harsh words _should _have been said—and then, little by little, she turned back to her own bodily care and left it to its own devices.

His feet itched to move forward, but Sesshoumaru held his ground. This was the _best _vantage point and he shouldn't give it up merely because of over-eagerness. He wasn't a pup any more, after all! Resisting temptation should be easy…

The small dog was now sniffing his mistress's clothing, nosing around in her garments as if there were hidden treats there. Sesshoumaru watched as he began licking something and his head cocked to the side as he tried to figure out what exactly the thing was after now. He checked back on the miko and slayer. Both females seemed to be oblivious to what was going on around them as they sunk into feminine laughter and gossip.

And then his golden moment came!

The miko's little monster snatched something from amongst the pile of human clothing and scurried off into the underbrush to escape notice with his pilfered prize. Sesshoumaru snorted when he realized this. The thing was no better than a kitsune!

He moved forward then, gliding around the females to where the beast was happily sitting and licking his stolen treat. The thing was so into what he was doing it didn't even realize Sesshoumaru was on it until it was too late!

His claws were raised, his ire was strong, his need to end this thing's life was there!

And then…

_Something _struck his nose that completely and totally altered his goals!

His nose twitching as if he were a feline, Sesshoumaru found himself actually getting down on all fours…searching. And the delightful smell—he soon realized—was being tainted by it!

Moving with youkai speed, Sesshoumaru snatched the small scrap of fabric from between the small dog's paws before it could contaminate that wonderful smell with another swipe of its little pink tongue. He held the fabric up to his nose then and breathed deep.

_Ah, _was all he could think as the small dog suddenly realized he was there, turned tail, and ran back towards its mistress without even a yip. _Fuck killing it…for now._

*PA*

"It looks like a drowned fucking rat with a cotton ball head," Inuyasha laughed, turning to look at Miroku.

Wisely the monk, feeling the glaring look of the miko in his midst and having seen firsthand her temper, kept his mouth closed, merely nodding as slightly as he could his agreement with the hanyou's viewpoint. Thankfully the miko was too engrossed into the care of her dog to much bother with irritations at the moment.

Kagome growled to herself, listening to Inuyasha once more bad-mouth her little savior. She put herself between the half-breed and her pup, loosely toweling across the poodle's sopping wet fur. While Inuyasha _may _be correct and the dog did now resemble a drowned rat, there was no need to be so cruel.

As done as she could be with the poodle—Kagome knew there would be hell to pay at the groomer's after this mess—she turned her attentions to other matters and continued to ignore her hanyou friend's crassness. Folding up her uniform and putting it away until tomorrow, Kagome reached for her shoes where she normally shoved her socks and underwear while bathing. It was as she removed those items that Kagome realized something was amiss…

Where were her underwear?

_to be continued…_


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five…

"Kagome! Where the fuck are you?"

Kagome huffed to herself and came out from behind the tree she'd been standing by. The day was sweltering hot and everyone was a little irritable right about now, but that didn't give him a right to talk to her like that. Crossing her arms over her chest, Kagome glared at the overreacting hanyou. "I'm right here, Inuyasha," she ground out between clenched teeth. Inuyasha had been going on like this _all damn day _and she was, quite frankly, getting tired of it.

"Then why the fuck do I smell you from over there?" Inuyasha demanded to know as he pointed towards the west.

"How would I know?" Kagome shot back. "Maybe your nose is becoming faulty? I better cut your ramen intake down."

Inuyasha's eyes sharpened as he glowered at her, his ears reflecting how pissed off he was at the moment. "Something is going on," he mumbled, turning his back to her. "And I don't like it."

"You don't like much of anything these days," Kagome said to him, a little glad when she saw his back stiffen.

Inuyasha spun back around to yell at her again but thankfully—for his sake or maybe even for hers—Miroku intervened, steering Inuyasha to one side of their current resting spot while Sango came and took her to the other side. "He is just worried about you," Sango tried to explain. "There is so much going on right now."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Kagome replied as she scooped Ichigo up into her arms. She rubbed the little poodle's body for comfort and gave him a peck on his fluffy head before setting him back down. "But it wouldn't hurt him to be a little nicer about it, would it?"

"Fuck coddling you!" Inuyasha screamed the other side of the clearing.

Kagome glared back and the snorted, stuck her nose in the air, and gave him her back very deliberately.

*PA*

Humans were such odd little creatures. Just look at his name for a prime example: Ichigo S. Badass Higurashi. Now was that any name for a dog of his caliber? He would have much preferred something nobler; something like François, Philippe, Gustave, Jules, or Pierre. Heck, he'd even have accepted Theodore or Thomas. But he supposed he could put up with the name the humans called him as long as they still kept providing him with such delicious and tasty meals.

The other humans _his _human traveled with were not that much more normal. If he had to pick a second favorite—and one he wouldn't mind adopting if she wasn't already owned—it would be the one named Sango. She had delightfully comfortable arms, loved to sneak him extra bites, and treated him as he deserved to be treated (except for that bathing incident—but no human was perfect).

And as odd as humans were those _other _creatures were even stranger…

The one who smelled of fox (Ichigo thought his name was Shippy or something like that) was tolerable—especially when he played with his toys and allowed him to have one or two—but he could tell that the fox boy was a little envious of all the attention he got. Oh well. In time the little pooch might learn how to get his own attentions in not quite such a showy manner. After all, classy and noble breeds did not need to show off quite so much and more was won with sugar (sugar being little licks and wide-brown pleading eyes) than with sourness.

The little cat was also tolerable and actually his favorite of the otherskind his human kept company with_. _She was quiet, demure, and did not seem to care that he was there.

However, the one his human pet called Inuyasha had to have something wrong with his brain. Perhaps he had been dropped on his head one too many times and it was now broken? Ichigo could think of no other reason for the male's behavior.

The being called Inuyasha—who had a _much _better name than he (though it wasn't quite up to the status of Philippe)—refused his very nature! He was some kind of dog. At least he smelled that way. He even scratched himself with his foot, sniffed the ground, chased after the sticks his human threw, and Ichigo had even seen him raising his leg to pee when he thought no one was looking. Yet the dumb animal swore up and down that he wasn't to be treated like one.

What was wrong with being regarded as a dog? Belly rubs were awesome…

Stranger still was the being that smelled almost like Inuyasha and was a thief of tasty, delicious smelling things!

Ichigo knew that _that_ one stalked them. He'd caught wind of his stolen toy several times that day and even the one called Inuyasha had noticed this, too.

Humans were _so _inferior to dogs (and this was just another reason to add to the list on why he couldn't understand Inuyasha's preference to not be labeled such) as none of the others in their group had seemed to noticed that the great white fraidy cat (insert personal chuckle here) had hardly given them a moment's respite from his obnoxious presence.

Ichigo had a sneaking suspicion that the provider of his belly rubs was in danger of being stolen…and only so that _that _repressed mongrel could have his _own _belly rubbed. Humph. If the over-sized, too-fluffy Chihuahua whose bite and bark were about as scary as a caterpillar crawling across the ground wanted his belly rubbed so badly what he really needed to do was find his own human pet! Of course he doubted that _that _one was smart enough to even realize what he was craving. Some dogs were just born without enough brains…

Ichigo raised his head from where he was lounging in the sunlight to look towards his human pet. She was glaring dangers at the want-to-not-be-a-dog boy and Inuyasha was doing his best (which wasn't saying much) to try and ignore her. Those ears on his head were swiveling left and right, though, which was a dead give-away that he was paying almost every ounce of attention on his pet. Silly dog-boy.

Turning his head, he sniffed the air and caught scent of his stolen prize once more. The other one was definitely growing bolder; obviously taking advantage of the ruckus caused by his human and Inuyasha.

He gave a little woof, a warning to stay away, and was pleased when the taller dog seemed to obey.

*PA*

Sesshoumaru was growing bored with watching. He wanted…action. Yes. He was a demon of action, after all.

Skirting around where his half-brother and group were lounging away the afternoon, he narrowed his eyes in contemplation of his half-brother's wasting lifestyle. Wasn't he searching for those shards? Wasn't he searching for Naraku? Why then were they spending half the day just sitting? They were not even trying to sharpen their skills—and Kami knew they needed that help. Especially Inuyasha. Well, perhaps the slayer did not, but then she was a slayer, after all.

_Some were inherited skills; greatness one is born with_, Sesshoumaru thought as his eyes slid towards his half-brother yet again, _Though sometimes even the Kami forgot to pass those skills on._

He noticed that yet again his half-brother and the miko were arguing. Honestly they play fought more than Jaken and Rin. Inuyasha should just get off his surely roughly washed ass and take the miko bitch as his own once and for all. That would keep the female human—though he was loathed to have her connected to him in any form or fashion—in check…maybe. She was quite a spunky little thing, after all. Mayhap she was _too _much for the hanyou? What she really needed was a strong youkai, a capable master—like himself (only not himself).

Taking the scrap of fabric out from underneath his armor once more, Sesshoumaru raised it up to his nose and sniffed it again. He noticed how both the hanyou and the malicious little beast both raised their noses in the air when he removed the piece of the miko's strange ensemble and his lips lifted slightly as he could feel their envy at his ownership burning within them. They _wanted _what he had…and it felt good to "wave it under their noses", so to speak.

Deciding that he'd stood around enough and being in the mood to beat on something, Sesshoumaru stashed the miko's strange garment back into its keeping spot and headed inward towards his half-brother's pack. He determined the best angle to come at them from, the best entrance to make, and what his opening line would be after Inuyasha got all of his blustering out of the way. Then he strategized exactly how _much _of his growing frustration the hanyou's body could take. After all, it wouldn't be a good thing if he accidentally killed his half-brother because he'd injured him too deeply only days before Inuyasha's human time of the month.

Fuck.

Sesshoumaru drew to a halt, his hands fisting at his side. It wouldn't be possible to beat on Inuyasha just yet. The new moon, through his calculations (which were never incorrect because he was infallible) was only a day away.

Turning away, Sesshoumaru decided that perhaps it was time to check on Rin and Jaken instead. The imp, more than likely, would offer _some _form of stress relief… His steps, though, stumbled as the sound of a woof reached his sensitive ears. The woof had come from the miko's guardian, he knew, and it told him in no uncertain terms to get the hell away and not come back.

Oh hell no!

_to be continued…_


	6. Chapter 6

a/n: It's short. Deal with it.

Chapter Six…

Sesshoumaru, all righteous anger and ready to show it in ways only _he _was capable of, came upon a very peculiar scene. And while, truthfully, he'd taken his time to arrive (wanting to heighten the fear of his impending entrance and _not _because he was frightened by the miko's wee guardian) this change should not have surprised him because of who was involved in the scene. It didn't, really, but what was occurring before his eyes did somehow…appeal…to his nature.

How odd.

He stumbled to a halt—forgetting instantly that he was less than graceful in some way because that just wasn't possible—and secretly salivated as he watched what was now occurring in the clearing.

The tense atmosphere from before had shifted. His brother, while still pissed with his ears laid back, sat some distance away from the miko, but everyone else in his brother's pack had seemed to move on.

And the miko was now tossing something around…

Sesshoumaru's eyes zeroed in on what she was throwing. He watched as the seeming white ball of delectability glided through the air and landed, skidding slightly against the earth. Then he watched as the miko's little beast pounced upon it, tail wagging with glee. The monster would then take the thing _back _tothe miko and she would toss it again.

Oh. He wanted this…thing.

And by the Kami what a Sesshoumaru wants, a Sesshoumaru gets!

*PA*

"Kagome," Sango asked as she sat down next to her, "What are you doing?"

"I'm playing to relieve stress," the miko answered, shooting Inuyasha a glare—which the hanyou pointedly made a show of seeing and ignoring. Ichigo returned with his make-shift toy then and Kagome took it in hand. It was only a ruined shirt of hers tied closed and stuffed with grasses and a dog treat for smell, but the poodle seemed not to mind the homeliness of it. He growled playfully while she tried to wrest it from his jaws and released it eventually for her to throw again. "He's got tons of these at home and I guess I forgot he likes to play. He's only a puppy, after all."

"May I try?" Sango asked as Ichigo brought his "toy" back.

"Sure," Kagome answered, willing to share in her stress relief.

She wrestled her shirt from Ichigo and handed his toy over to Sango. The poodle's intense gaze immediately shifted to the slayer and he yipped encouragingly. Sango laughed at his antics and tossed the shirt. Ichigo quickly retrieved it, appearing as a brown streak to the rest of them, and brought it back to Sango. "He really likes it," the slayer remarked, sounding surprised, as she proceeded to copy Kagome's movements in a game of tug-a-war with the poodle.

"Doesn't Kirara play?" Kagome asked offhandedly. Actually, come to think of it, she'd never seen Kirara play at all. The neko youkai seemed all seriousness. "Or didn't she?" she corrected herself.

"Kirara was already several hundred years old when she became my friend," Sango answered as she finally tugged the shirt free and tossed it again.

Kagome looked over to where Kirara was resting in the shade in her smaller form. The neko youkai, sensing her regard, raised her head briefly, her eyes seeming to twinkle with delight, and then she curled up again. "Wow. I didn't know Kirara was that…old."

Sango laughed at that, the sound a good one to hear from one who had suffered so much. "Youkai age differently than humans, Kagome," she reminded her.

"Yeah," shot Inuyasha from across their resting site. "Hanyous too!"

"Then _obviously _you're still a baby!" Kagome couldn't help but shoot back. Honestly, he'd left himself open with that one.

Shippou, sitting with Miroku, snickered but quieted when Inuyasha's eyes turned his way. "That's it. We're heading back towards the well. Now."

"Yeah," Kagome agreed, standing up. "I could do with some time away from you."

"You're not going anywhere," Inuyasha countered. "We're getting rid of _that,_" he continued, pointing towards the still playing poodle, "And then everything is going to go back to like it was BEFORE."

*PA*

His moment came when the slayer used her considerable strength—for a human that is—to toss the delectable item farther away from everyone. Moving forward, Sesshoumaru intercepted it before the beast could reach it. Placing his booted foot directly on top of it, he raised an eyebrow as the dog skidded to a stop before him.

The poodle wisely retreated, running back towards his mistress.

_Ha, _Sesshoumaru thought as he eyed the mongrel now growling at him from between the miko's spread legs. _Take that. _Though now he had to deal with the uncomfortable feeling of seeing that _thing _by her side…

_Ridiculous_, Sesshoumaru sniffed internally.

One by one, as they noticed his presence, the small, oddly put together group in front of him reacted. Inuyasha, acting as typical as always, brandished his sword and moved in between he and the miko. The slayer rose, readying her weapon as well. Her neko stood, but reserved her strength; her cat's eyes merely judging the situation at hand. The monk moved to stand by his friends and the little kitsune went straight into the miko's arms. "Sesshoumaru," his little brother snarled.

Sesshoumaru looked past them all, none a threat to him, and stared at the miko who had remained sitting, a dumb expression on her face. Keeping eye-contact with her, he bent down and plucked the thing up. The dog noticeably whined when he saw it in his claws. Sesshoumaru smirked as he twisted what the miko had called a toy around, sniffing unnoticeably at it as he savored the mixture of both the miko's scent and whatever else was inside.

Reaching into his haori, he retrieved the bit of fabric from its keeping place and his ears picked up the outraged startle of the miko. Ignoring her, he compared the scents from that delicious piece of cloth to the new one in his hands…

_Tangy. But something is off…_

Lost to his musings and certain none of those before him would dare risk their lives, Sesshoumaru failed to notice as the miko rose, set the kitsune aside, and stomped towards him. The pest lapping at her heels with low woofs, though, was not to be ignored. "Those are _mine_!" she fairly screeched as she ripped the cloth away from his claws just as Sesshoumaru was about to address to matter of his invaded personal space.

His lips downturned as Sesshoumaru glared at her, angry to have had his indulgence taken away. Using his youkai speed, he stole them back. The miko gasped, her eyes widening as she watched him tuck his pilfered item back away out of her sight. "Give. Them. Back," she bit out.

"Kagome!" shouted Inuyasha from behind her, obviously eager to rush to her aid but not wanting to move just in case he took offense and acted out against the miko before him. "Get your ass back here!"

"He has my underwear, Inuyasha," the miko bit out, not looking away from his face even though her skin was turning a strange color of red. Sesshoumaru sniffed at her scent. Why was she embarrassed?

"What the fuck?" his little brother screeched and Sesshoumaru raised his eyes to look beyond the woman to the hanyou.

The miko, seeing this, used that to her advantage as she dove forward, colliding with his body. Her little human hands forced their way underneath his armor before he knew what she was about and latched onto her clothing. She yanked the fabric out with a cry of victory—that quickly soured as Sesshoumaru wrapped his own arms around her and squeezed her against him. "Oof," she said—delightfully to _his _ears—as the breath was knocked out of her body.

*PA*

_Okay. Maybe it hadn't been the brightest idea to infiltrate the daiyoukai's armor…Maybe_, Kagome thought as she narrowly missed being impaled by one of the spikes covering his chest. _But still! He stole my UNDERWEAR!_

Looking upwards, she gulped when she saw the look in Sesshoumaru's eyes but she wrapped her fingers even tighter around her panties anyway. There was no way in hell she was going to just _let _him have them. "Put me down," she ordered in her most "motherly" voice.

Surprisingly, the daiyoukai did…though his hands did not leave her.

Kagome looked up at him once more, but saw that his attentions were still elsewhere. And the next thing she knew…everyone else was gone and she was alone with Sesshoumaru.

_What in the hell…?_

Gulping, Kagome cast a look over her shoulder, hoping against hope to see someone—or even some _thing_ —that she knew. Nothing. There was nothing. Taking another swallow and feeling the fire of her ire from before dwindle down to nothing, she looked back towards Sesshoumaru.

The daiyoukai was staring down at her, seeming to have been waiting to catch her gaze again. He held up the "toy" she'd crafted for Ichigo, holding it out for her. Out of reflex, Kagome took it. "Throw it," Sesshoumaru ordered.

And she did, tossing the make-shift toy as hard as she could because what else could she do?

Immediately Sesshoumaru moved away from her, transforming into his larger state once more and very nearly crushing her. Kagome cried out as she dove for cover, falling upon the ground and covering her head to protect herself from the flying debris. It wasn't until she felt the now familiar coating of Sesshoumaru's doggy breath on the back of her neck that Kagome raised her head…to be greeted by the sight of Sesshoumaru in his dog form with her "toy" clutched delicately in his canines.

Scrambling up onto her feet, Kagome stared down dumbly at the toy as Sesshoumaru dropped it at her feet. She leaned down and picked it up instinctively, having been trained by her brother's poodle to do so. Almost immediately Sesshoumaru dropped down into a crouch, wagging his tail.

_This is fucked up, _Kagome thought as she threw the toy again and Sesshoumaru once more bounded after it. She had to close her eyes and look away to keep from getting a face full of dirt. _Very fucked up._

Yet, despite how screwed up everything was, Kagome could not help but throw her shirt again for the daiyoukai when he returned…and she even found herself enjoying the interaction.

_to be continued…_


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven…

_I can't do this anymore, _Kagome moaned to herself as she threw Ichigo's make-shift toy YET again. Her body was sore from having to keep tossing her balled up shirt—and the shirt wasn't fairing too well either. Slobber covered and full of holes from Sesshoumaru's teeth, it had lost most of the grasses she'd stuffed it with and barely flew at all when she tossed it now. The daiyoukai seemed not to mind though if the constant wag of his tail was any indication.

Falling down onto her butt, she grimaced as once more her shirt was dropped down onto her lap. It made a squishy gooey sound as it landed on her and Kagome could feel the dog slobber soaking through the clothes she was wearing. _Ew…_she thought silently—glad her tongue was staying quiet for once—as she picked the shirt up with two fingers and tossed it again, watching as droplets of drool flung off as it flew through the air.

This time the daiyoukai didn't even have to really turn his head to retrieve it and give it back to her. When he dropped it once more down for her to get, Kagome couldn't stop the suffering groan from escaping her lips and she fell back onto the earth.

Death might be sweet relief…because this was just plain torture.

"I can't keep doing this, Sesshoumaru!" Kagome yelled, covering her eyes with her arm and grimacing as the motion was too much like what she had been doing for what felt like hours now. At least Sesshoumaru had learned very quickly that he couldn't play the same tug-of-war game he'd witnessed Ichigo doing. Now that had been scary, flying through the air, and the landing hadn't been much better.

Sesshoumaru nosed her prone form, the coldness making her jump. Kagome uncovered her face to stare up at the monstrous white dog above her. His column size legs were on either side of her laying spot making Kagome feel like she was caged in fur. "We have to work something else out," she pleaded, letting her voice fade with the vain hope that Sesshoumaru would understand and be in an acquiescing mood…

…which apparently he was not, if the menacing growl that escaped his mouth and the curling back of his lips baring his lethal fangs was any clue.

"Gah!" Kagome shouted in frustration, picking up the remains of her shirt and throwing it at him.

Much to her personal satisfaction, the shirt hit him straight on the nose, making one last oozing sound as it died finally. Sesshoumaru staggered backwards slightly, shaking his muzzle to dislodge the ruined cloth. He turned immense, glaring red eyes in her direction then, looking entirely put out now that his toy was gone. "I can't do it anymore!" Kagome shouted at him, slamming her hands down onto the ground with emphasis. "I'm sore, I'm tired, I'm covered in drool, and I'm hungry!"

She pushed herself to her feet, wincing as the cuts and bruises she'd earned this day made themselves known once more. The daiyoukai eyed the remains of her shirt and then looked at her once more, growling. Kagome scowled back, placing her hands on her hips in a truly outraged female fashion. "Don't you growl at me, Sesshoumaru," she bit out. "And I've had enough with you abducting me for puppy play! You need to find someone else to indulge yourself with because this miko has had it."

His canine form glowered down at her and Kagome could read in his eyes what he would have been telling her-if he could talk to her in a language she could understand. He would have been saying something along the lines of 'you dare to order this Sesshoumaru?'

"Oh I dare!" Kagome shot back even though he hadn't actually _said _anything. She quietly murdered the scared voices in her head as she did, too. Yes Sesshoumaru was not a youkai to piss off—but she wasn't to be taken lightly either! And she felt that she'd put up with enough since Sesshoumaru had come across them and her poodle.

Speaking of poodles…

"And why in the hell are you so terrified of my poodle?"

His head moved slightly and his eyes widened and then narrowed. Kagome read into that look, too. _He's thinking that __this__ one is __not__ afraid, _she mocked in her mind. "It's a freaking toy poodle, Sesshoumaru!" Kagome answered her mental mocking. Then she began to pace as she tried to figure out how her life had become this. "No one is afraid of toy poodles!"

*PA*

_The girl is losing her fragile hold on her mental state, _Sesshoumaru observed as he watched the miko. She was now pacing in between his legs and every once in a while she'd reach out and run her fingers through his fur as she either berated him or tried to soothe him. As much as he detested being stroked by her and as much as her ramblings were almost impossible to follow, he found he did not move away from her and actually _wanted _more. "Now don't say that, Sesshoumaru," the miko continued as she stroked through his leg fur again. "You have a very nice coat."

Was she having a one-sided conversation where she spoke FOR him?

He observed her haggard appearance and decided that perhaps her human weaknesses had finally caught up with her. After all, the miko had been throwing that delightful creation of hers for almost the entire day and well into the evening.

Decision made, as he wanted her to make him another toy, Sesshoumaru leaned down and very carefully picked the miko up with his teeth by her clothing. He winced as she screamed and was tempted to bite down in a firmer fashion when she flailed uselessly around, but a soft growl and the realization that he wasn't going to eat her as she'd screeched for him not to in much vulgar terms (as if he'd indulge in such junk food) seemed to calm her down. Or at least it stopped her from hurting his ears…

*PA*

_This is…different, _Kagome thought as she hung from Sesshoumaru's mouth struggling to keep her shirt from inching up and making her flash the world. _Of course, only an idiot would come close enough to Sesshoumaru to actually be able to SEE anything._

After the first few terrifying minutes and the rambling pleas to NOT be eaten (wow, she seemed to be asking that of Sesshoumaru a lot lately...), she'd realized Sesshoumaru had something else planned for her. Whatever that might be, Kagome was fairly certain she didn't want to dwell on it as the daiyoukai probably thought she was insane (and right then Kagome was tending to agree with him). So she'd just decided to "hang on", as it were, and see what he had in store for her

At least she didn't have to throw anything.

Then the daiyoukai began trotting forward and the ride was even more bracing. It was entirely different than riding on Kirara or Inuyasha's back that was for sure. A very much more terrifying means of travel, as well, as the only thing keeping her in Sesshoumaru's mouth was her shirt—whose material couldn't stand up to much of the dog demon's abuse as had been previously proven—and she was a long, long way from the ground. Had he gotten bigger?

Closing her eyes to keep from staring at the quickly passing ground, Kagome 'eeped' when Sesshoumaru finally came to a stop and began to shuffle around. She only knew he was doing something because she kept swaying back and forth, back and forth. Just when Kagome thought she just might vomit from the continued swaying, she felt Sesshoumaru lowering his head. Relief filled her as Kagome felt the ground beneath her feet again and his teeth released their hold on her.

Kagome stumbled forward, falling intentionally down to her hands and knees as she tried to deny the urge to kiss the ground. When her earth worshiping was over, she raised her head to take stock of her new predicament, feeling Sesshoumaru still standing behind her.

_What in the hell?_

She was in a hole…

*PA*

It was with some…amusement…thatSesshoumaru watched the miko's facial expressions when she realized where she was.

At least it had shut her long-winded mouth up.

He doubted she had even been aware that her one-sided conversation had continued unending after she'd gotten over the fact that he wasn't going to eat her. Again, how disgusting. Humans were hardly palatable…

He _did _wonder, however, where in the world the miko had gotten such ideas about his manner of conversing from. Some of the things she had attributed him to saying were downright ludicrous.

Deciding it was time for the miko to rest, he leaned down and nosed her. She immediately fell back onto the ground with a 'oof' sound, all righteous fury once more. _It is strange how I put up with that from her_, Sesshoumaru thought, _but that can be contemplated on at another time._

Using her position to his favor, he scooped a large portion of the dirt he'd dug out to create the hole she was in back into it and onto the miko as well. She screamed as the dirt covered her from her chest down and then glared up at him as she began to attempt to scoot out from underneath the mound.

His paw put lightly down on top of her struggling form and a low woof stilled her immediately. _She is finally learning, _he mentally sighed, glad to have that frustration off his back as he curled up around the hole he'd placed her in to sleep. While he wouldn't normally do this—and actually never had before—he didn't want her trying to slip away and he wanted to get a bit of sleep himself.

*PA*

"I am now a bone to him," Kagome stated as she stared up at the sky overhead. "My, the stars are looking pretty tonight."

A large dog head blocked her view for a minute and Sesshoumaru let out another woof. Kagome blinked, trying to get the dirt he'd blown at her out of her face. "Oh shut up," she snidely replied. "I'm not going anywhere!"

His red eyes narrowed menacingly, but the daiyoukai laid his head back down. "And I can talk if I want to!" she shouted up at him, waiting for him to come back into her line of sight.

The massive dog body curled around her current imprisonment merely took a deep, long breath that was slowly released.

Kagome gave him a minute of silence before continuing to talk. It wasn't her fault that, when stuck in a situation like this—not that she'd ever actually been buried before, she talked nonstop. "At least he let me breathe," she said as she tested the weight of the earth piled on her. Her arms were loosening the more she wiggled and this was a good sign. "Though I'm not sure for how much longer this will go on since I can't seem to shut myself up."

As if in answer to her spoken words, the dog form of Sesshoumaru sighed again. His paw gave a little kick, sending more dirt sliding down into the hole. Kagome coughed as much of it ended up on or near her face. Twisting her head to raise it up above the dirt once more, she glared up at the offending dog demon and mouthed a quiet 'fuck you' before taking a deep breath.

_Think, Kagome, _she told herself. _Think __quietly__ about how to get out of this situation. _

She was surprised Inuyasha had not stumbled upon them yet—her hanyou had a way about him when it came to her being abducted. How far away had Sesshoumaru taken her? Were they even still in Japan? _Of course we are, silly. He wouldn't want to leave his territory just to play puppy._

Or maybe he had?

Mind reeling from this maybe latest predicament, Kagome became unerringly still and just listened. Everything sounded…Japanese…and now Sesshoumaru was snoring away above her. Would he sleep outside land that wasn't his?

Nah, of course not!

_And now to get the hell away from this freak…_

*PA*

_to be continued…_


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight…

_I'm a little teapot, short and stout, _Kagome mentally sang to keep herself from talking as she slowly wiggled and maneuvered herself to freedom. _Here's my handle… And here's my spout! _she silently crowed triumphantly as she loosened both of her hands.

It had taken a lot longer than she had thought it would, having had to stop several times for long minutes as Sesshoumaru shifted in his sleep above her.

Sliding the rest of her body free, Kagome grimaced as she looked over her clothes. Yet another uniform was destroyed! Sending a silent glare up at the sleeping youkai, she swore retribution for this—though she had no idea what in the hell that would encompass.

_And now to get out of this hole…because I am NOT a bone._

The hole he'd dug wasn't fairly large, but it _was_ deep; the top being over her head by a nice distance. To make matters worse, Sesshoumaru was curled around the entire perimeter. She would have to engage his body with some form of contact to get out.

Judging from the sounds of his soft snores—who _knew _Sesshoumaru snored!—Kagome started scrambling up the side farthest away from his face. If he woke and was in a biting mood she wanted the slim possibility there that he'd nip his own self while trying to get at her. She was a lot smaller than him, after all.

Finally, after much sliding and silent cursing, Kagome breached the top and came face to foot with Sesshoumaru's giant paw. _Wow…_

It was kind of…cute? Even the vicious looking claws that tipped each toe were adorable in a lethal sort of way. The pads of his paw, a big as her head, with tiny scruffs of silky white fur sticking out from around them looked almost invitingly touchable. _Do NOT touch, Kagome, _she told herself as she somehow managed to pull up into a standing position balancing precariously on the lip of the hole in the tiny space left by Sesshoumaru's back foot.

A glance over her shoulder to where his head rested on his front paws revealed that she was around Sesshoumaru's stomach. There was a slight opening to the outside world over by his tail, but then she'd have to come dangerously close to that damned nose of his to get out. _To hell with it, girl. Just go!_

Her mental pep talk done, Kagome went to make her escape just as Sesshoumaru shifted in his sleep again. The paw she'd been standing in front of moved, causing her to stumble out of its way or risk being kicked back down into the hole. Kagome, feeling herself about to fall anyway, did as every falling human does and grabbed for a handhold. Unfortunately for her the only handhold around happened to be Sesshoumaru. When she realized she was yanking on his fur, Kagome squeaked and let go, falling anyway.

Thankfully she fell _into_ him and not back down into the hole. Well, maybe thankfully.

Hands splayed across fluffy silkiness and face practically buried in his fur, Kagome chanced a look at Sesshoumaru's head. She could barely make it out now through the massive amount of fuzz in her face, but the daiyoukai still seemed to be sleeping. _Thank the Kami for small miracles…_

Slowly moving her hands, Kagome surmised that she was _now _buried in his belly and that during all of Sesshoumaru's restless shifting the paw that had been in front of her was behind her…trapping her there. Taking a peek to her right, Kagome screwed her eyes shut as she caught a glimpse of Sesshoumaru's privates—which also happened to be too close for comfort—and quickly turned her head in the opposite direction. _Wow…_she let herself think as she inched her way further towards the left, keeping herself steady by dragging her hands through his fur.

The sound of a whimper brought her to a dead stop—with even her breathing coming to a halt.

Leaning out slightly, Kagome took a peek in the daiyoukai's direction, relieved to see his eyes still closed. So why the whimper? Kagome slid a little farther towards her escape and then stopped again to judge the slight distance she'd passed. As soon as her hands—which she'd been using to guide herself through Sesshoumaru's thick belly fur—stopped, the daiyoukai whimpered again.

Was he enjoying getting his belly rubbed?

_Hm, _Kagome mused to herself, _Escape now or rub his belly a little and escape later with a story to tell…_

Being that she was partially insane now, Kagome chose the latter option and dug her fingers past the guard hairs of Sesshoumaru's doggy form so that her fingers grazed against the pink skin of his belly. She ran them back and forth from where she was currently standing but soon realized his belly was a lot larger than a human standing in one place could rub. And she wanted a story, damn it…

Much to the daiyoukai's enjoyment, Kagome began walking back and forth as she massaged her hands across his stomach. When she came to a particularly delicious spot, she had to fight back the giggles as the daiyoukai whimpered for more and even kicked his leg once in enjoyment. It wasn't until she'd been at this game for _quite _some time—having lost her need to escape as she sought out _more _of the daiyoukai's pleasure points—that Kagome realized Sesshoumaru was getting off in more ways than one.

She actually realized this on a downward passage of his stomach. When she looked up to judge the distance from where she was to where she needed to be, Kagome came face to penis with Sesshoumaru.

_A dog's penis is red?_

*PA*

Inuyasha scrambled across the countryside doing what he did best—which was screaming Kagome's name at the top of his lungs. His ears kept waiting for her accompanying callback, but the sound of her voice never seemed to reach him.

Damn Sesshoumaru… Why did his brother have to go all psycho all of the sudden over his damn miko? Didn't he know that females like her were hard to come by? Yeah, sure. He'd had TWO actually, but damn it. Fuck'en hell!

He bit his tongue to stop the involuntary whimper building in his throat. He was like a child who'd had their toy stolen…

FUCK!

…he HAD had his toy stolen.

Casting a glare over his shoulder where the others followed because his brother wasn't there to stare madly at, Inuyasha's eyes zeroed in on the poodle wrapped in Sango's arms.

It was all that stupid fur ball's fault this had happened. If the poodle hadn't come through the well Sesshoumaru would never have paid his miko any attention at all and all that sweet loving attention would have been his for the taking.

Growling softly to himself, Inuyasha turned and eyed the horizon again. Yeah it was night and yeah there really wasn't any point in chasing after something he couldn't smell the scent of, but damn it to hell! Kagome was alone with the bastard doing who knew what with that sick puppy…

*PA*

"Wow," she said aloud, quickly slapping her hand over her mouth. The sound of her own voice had startled her she'd been trying so hard to be quiet. _I think I have enough of a story, _Kagome told herself within her mind a second later.

Almost reluctantly disengaging her other hand from the daiyoukai's so soft tummy, Kagome looked around her. It was full night now, so dark she could hardly see in front of her, but thankfully Sesshoumaru was white and that whiteness seemed to stand out in the darkness. Also her eyes had kind of adjusted to the gloom while she'd rubbed his tummy.

Giggling softly to herself, Kagome could not stop herself from giving his personal space another glance. Yep. Definitely red. Definitely…out there.

Feeling herself blush and wondering why in the hell as she was a modern girl and had seen pictures of plenty of penises—animal and human alike, Kagome began working her way towards the daiyoukai's large head. Thankfully he was still sleeping peacefully and was unaware that she'd kinda, sorta taken advantage of him.

If Sesshoumaru ever found out…

An involuntary shudder laced with foreboding raced through her body and Kagome had to stop moving for a moment while her heart rate and breathing calmed down. Once all seemed right, she began inching forward once more. Only once or twice in her trail blazing towards her escape point had she needed to brace herself against the daiyoukai and Kagome applauded herself for not being _too _clumsy for once. Finally, though, she reached the point of no return…

She couldn't help but eye his huge mouth which she knew to be filled with razor-sharp teeth and his oh-so talented nose. If he took a big enough breath while he was sleeping as she narrowly passed by there, his instincts would let him know in a heartbeat that not all was right and that he should wake up.

Closing her eyes, Kagome whispered up a prayer to the Kamis, praying that they might take pity on her and give her an easy out. Then, taking a deep breath herself and holding it in—as if that would encourage Sesshoumaru to do the same—she sidled forward.

*PA*

_To be continued…_


End file.
